Thursday, September 4, 2008

A Goldmine of Engrish

My friend K found the ultimate goldmine of Engrish. In case you don't already know, Engrish is the wonderful dialect of English spoken in Japan. This goldmine is an anime called "Cheeky Angel". The company hired some really lousy translator to create subtitles, and pure comedy ensues. The ironic thing is, the whole anime is available on YouTube with correct fan-made subtitles. You only get the messed up Engrish subtitles if you actually, you know, buy the DVDs from the company. Score one for YouTube, or something.

You can get a slightly larger version of any screenshot by clicking it.

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Engrish asshead
Well, we're off to a good start! If this translator has a favorite word, we're gonna see soon that it is "asshead".

Engrish pierrot clown genie djinniBecause of differences in the grammar, a common mistake made by Japanese people trying to use English, is to use adjectives as nouns.

Engrish be cleansHere's a guy with a cleans soul.

Engrish feel him funnyI'm not sure whether it's a good thing or a bad thing to be felt funny.

anime picture with EngrishYou'd think if the guy were wounded by an elementary kid, that would indicate he was BAD at fighting...

anime picture with EngrishApparently the main character was raised in an all-female society and never touched a male human being before...

badly translated anime picture with EngrishThis, from the opening or closing theme song (not sure which), is the most inexplicable subtitle. Theme songs often have subtitles in Japanese and/or English already, whether or not you turn on the subtitle version of the DVD. And this particular part of the song is partly in English, so the original artists already put most the subtitle in, as you can clearly see in the white writing. The one Japanese word there, 眩しい (mabushii), that means "bright". I have no idea where the translator got "paint" from, considering the subtitle was practically already written.

Engrish nobody but idiot would play boss game in senior highNow I feel bad because I always played boss game in senior high :(

Engrish couldnt even beat a third gradeNow I'm left wondering whether Suoyuanza got beat up by a third grade kid, or whether he just failed to pass third grade.

Engrish avoid a gorgonI don't care whether Whitney's a girl or a guy... nobody should be messing around with gorgons!

Engrish a big troubleThey're talking about me in this screenshot. I'm a huge trouble. ;)

Engrish a band of assheadThere we go with the assheads again.

Engrish have the heart beatWell heck, now I wanna know what this "such a thing" is she's talking about...

Hey magician, see how I beat youFor some reason, I can't look at this without just cracking up.

Hurry for the classSage advice for anyone in college.

How cruel you are to get hard on an oldWait, kids in Japan are allowed to casually carry freakin swords around??

What a fun I wonder when they'll quit playingI particularly like this screenshot because I have a shirt which also uses "fun" as a countable noun. My shirt says: "This is the dressing up. Which makes your heart. It is a fun to dress myself." I heart Japan.

I've lost to women for twiceHang in there, friend. Eventually you will win to women.

No, I won't kiss boys Not even I dieI think she's trying to say she's immortal?

Don't tell me how intimate we are I'm out of itI hate when I'm out of it.

My hand got a slip, sorryI think this line is better without context.

Ok, but the happy our is over You'll pay ten years of life for itIt sucks when bars pull this on you. At first it's $1 for a drink, then once you're feeling all good and comfy, happy our ends and the price goes up to ten years of your life.

Go for an alien, AssheadThis is gonna be my new default retort. Anyone crosses me, it's "Go for an alien, Asshead!"

It means you're getting a womanWhoah :)

What weirdly you laughHe's totally dissing the girl behind him. "Talk to the hand, weirdly laughing girl!"

Really, what a shit on me this timeMan, I must be getting old, I'm starting to lose touch with all the new slang

You... you... what're the crapA good, all-purpose phrase which I'll be adding to my daily lexicon. "What're the crap!" It pretty much sums up my reaction to most these subtitles, too.

What's so fun to fight with woman(Answer: the hot makeup sex)

That's not the crap marry me pleaseHe might not speak very good English, but at least the white-haired dude has balls. Must be a GlowingFaceMan reader.

I gotta find that book and the old to return me to a boyWell, then. Maybe you should go to the library. And then the oldrary.

That's right, this asshead got caught to smell your shoesI'm pretty sure this sort of thing only happens in Japan.


Well, I hope you have enjoyed these Engrish subtitles, and that you've gained some skill in the Engrish dialect. Actually, this guy pretty much sums it up:
What you look seems to please you Then I'm assured
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What you read seems to please you
Then I'm assured.
Here a other article I write. Have an enjoy!
My Anime Story
Pictures from Japan
Connections Between Japanese and Buddhism
Using Words Effectively

5 comments:

Unknown said...

This made me laugh out loud several times. Just what I needed while working though piles of grammar research ;P

Anonymous said...

Glad you liked it!

Anonymous said...

I just linked to your post from my blog carnival and stumbled it. Come see the site and stumble back.

Anonymous said...

I laughed out loud at every single one of these XD

Unknown said...

I actually had to stop reading this and stick it in my bookmarks for later because i was laughing so much and didn't want to wake my roommate. Great stuff!

 
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