The Nimbus Quest: Introduction

You know how it feels when everything's going your way, when you're "in the zone" or "in state"? A friend and I have been sharing an ongoing dialog about how to feel that all the time. The web is full of exercises for getting in state. Like pumping your fist and shouting "YES!" or "LEVEL UP!" Or listening to exciting music. In my experience, these work, but the "state" they give me is a little artificial and flimsy. What's worse, it seems like the mind builds up an "immunity" so you can't overuse these tricks without always devising new and crazier ones. My friend and I want to be "in state" all the time. And that, dear readers, is The Nimbus Quest: Glowing Face Man's pursuit of total good state all the time. It may be a long journey, but I guarantee it will be a fun and enlightening one.


THEORY: THE DUALITY OF OUTER STATE

Among people who talk about state, one thing is almost universally agreed on: It's critically important not to let outside things drag your state down. Say for example, I'm "in the zone", and I go ask a girl out, and she shoots me down cold. There's a lot of pressure to lower my state because I just got shot down. I can't do that, if I want to complete the Nimbus Quest.

I can think of the rejection as being a big blob of outer "negative state" and I have the option of accepting it or not. I choose not to, because I don't want to lower my state, I want to stay "in the zone".

But here's where I diverge from the standard school of thought on state. If the common agreement is that I shouldn't accept negative outer state, then let's take a look at what happens when I accept positive outer state.

At the beginning of an interaction, I'm "in the zone", my state is entirely positive and good. I'm surrounded by an invisible "nimbus of glory and destiny". In this state, I go and (for example) ask for a raise at work. And my supervisor says, Okay! Sure! I get the raise. Now there's a big blob of outer "positive state" and I have the option of accepting this outer state boost, or not. If I accept the boost, my own state will be raised, I'll be lifted even higher by the thrill of getting the raise.

But here's the catch. Suppose I've accepted this boost of outer state. Now I'm walking around with all this positive state, but some of it is not my own. I don't own it and I don't control it. In the example, my boss still controls it, or, in a different sense, my financial situation controls it. I've given away power. Now, as soon as some financial setback comes up, all that extra positive state will crumble, dragging all of my state down with it.

My theory is, part of reaching constant positive state, is refusing all outer state-- bad or good.

Let's look at the dating example again. I ask a girl out, she accepts, and I let it bump my state up a notch. Later, she cancels. OOF, all that state I borrowed from her has been yanked away, dragging whatever other good state I had with it. And even if everything goes smooth, I'm still left with all this outside positive state which is reactionary in nature. I don't control it, and eventually, no matter how smooth I am, something will happen to take away that outside state.

So how will I react instead? I won't react-- I'll simply accept. I win a "best speaker" award at Toastmasters? I simply accept it-- politely turning down whatever positive state boost it offers.

It sounds absurd, at first glance, to intentionally turn down positive state boosts. But the fact is, many men have tried The Nimbus Quest (albeit not by that name), and failed. And you know what they say: If at first you don't succeed, try changing something. Accepting positive state from outside has failed many men, so I'm going to try teaching myself not to accept it. I'm going to go pure inner state.


STARVING THE EGO

One advantage of turning down outside state, is that I'll be keeping it away from stroking my ego. If I have a good night on the dance floor, and I accept all the positive outer state that comes with it, then a part of me identifies with dance floor success. Next night, I'll be subconsciously terrified to dance, knowing that if I don't have another good night, I'll literally die a little. The first night, I danced without caring because I was unattached. On the second night, shimmering with the positive outer state from before, suddenly I have a lot more to lose. My ego is invested in dancing, and if I screw up it will be like dying. That's the peril of accepting outer state.


SHORT STORY: THE SALESMAN

Once upon a time there was a door to door salesman, he sold widgets and gidgets. One day he was totally in the zone, it was like he was channeling the Roman god of merchants. Everyone he spoke to, bought his wares. He sold a hundred units that day. At the office he bragged about his exploits, and his workmates hailed him as The Second Coming of Christ of Sales.

The next day, he didn't sell a single widget. Not even a gidget. "What happened?!" asked his supervisor. "I don't know... I just didn't feel like making any approaches..."

The salesman was subconsciously terrified of doing anything that would damage his self-image as the Sales Pimp. If he made some approaches on that second day, he might fail, and if he failed, his ego would be crushed. When he did approach, he subconsciously sabotaged himself, so he'd have a subconscious excuse if he failed. He was reveling in yesterday's success and it totally paralyzed him.


WHERE DOES STATE COME FROM, IF NOT FROM OUTSIDE?

The disadvantage of turning down outer state boosts, of course, is I suddenly have much less places to get state from. So where does inner state come from? That's the million dollar question, isn't it! I have a few theories where I can get inner state from...

• Providing Value to People. Whether it be by writing an inspiring blog entry, giving money to a homeless person, or even just staying after class to help my students, the state boost I get from providing value seems different and "more inner" than the state I get, say, from getting checked out by a hot babe. Lately I've felt more and more of an urge to provide value to the world, and that's partly why I've been writing a lot more on GlowingFaceMan.
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• Unconditional Self-Esteem. I've been working on building unconditional self-esteem. What that means is that even when I screw up, I accept it, bearing in mind that I'm learning and growing and doing my best. For example, if I mess up a public speech, I tell myself, "I did good. I'm learning and getting better." By making my self-esteem less attached to outside results, I make it "more inner". Analogously to state, the "unconditional" part also means that I refuse to boost my self-esteem when I do exceptionally well at something. Unconditional means that outer results aren't even a variable in the self-esteem equation.
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• Unconditional Love for Others. This is a very difficult one, but I'm trying to learn how to love everyone around me, unconditionally. That means, if I'm doing voter registration for example, I love the person on the sidewalk whether they register with me, whether they ignore me, even if they flip me off. I have no proof that this strengthens inner state, and I can't really explain why I feel like it does, but I have a hunch that it just might.
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• Knowing Myself. I think one possible source of inner state would just come from knowing myself. Really knowing myself. For example, lots of people don't even know what they really want in life. They might be in university because society says that's where they should be, but it's not really what they want, deep inside. When I meet someone with true, deep, sincere convictions and passion about what they're doing in life, I am inspired. One step of The Nimbus Quest will be to really soul-search and study my own deeper self. I hope I can gain inner state from doing this.

All of this is just theory right now. Part of The Nimbus Quest will be figuring out which of the above things can increase Inner State, state that I have total control and power over. State that nothing in the world can take away.


IS THE NIMBUS QUEST REALLY POSSIBLE??

Who knows whether the nimbus quest is truly possible. Just to reiterate it all at once: The Nimbus Quest is the quest to be "in the zone", or "in state", ALL THE TIME.

I don't know whether the nimbus quest is humanly possible. Blaise Pascal, in his Pensees, basically said it's impossible, but what does he know, he was just some French nerd from the 17th century.

Whether or not the Quest is possible, I'm going to give it everything I have. If I can raise my overall state even a single notch, it's worth it. I'm sure I'll learn a lot about myself, and about human nature, and about social interaction, in the process.

The Nimbus Quest...
TO BE CONTINUED...!!!

Here are some other articles I've written. I hope they provide value to you.
The Relationship Between Happiness and Material Wealth
Qualia, Nimbus, and Presence
Soft Power and Hard Power